new years. what can i say? happy new years! my cab got so lost coming home from williamsburg that we had to take a trip through the city to get back to brooklyn heights. thus, reconfirming my hatred of the williamsburg area. williamsburg has never not been a huge pain in my ass. i don't want to hear about it. if i were marty markowitz, i would petition to make williamsburg not part of brooklyn.
no offense to people who have to live there cuz it's cheap; i know not everyone's parents have a wicked basement. a wicked basement which, as of today, has cable. this is quite a fitting new year's gift. i can now officially live downstairs. the past few months have been pretty cramped, living right next door to my parents room, and finding them in my room watching my tv every time i came home. now i'm my own woman, with my own pad. i feelz good.
right now i'm watching the america's top model where tyra freaks out and yells at that girl, "you better take responsibility for yourself." brilliant. but also, kind of oddly in line with my new year's resolution. i don't think i've ever really made a new year's resolution before, or not anything besides like, i will lose weight or i will cut my toenails more regularly. this year, i feel like i really want to challenge myself. or i guess, take responsibility for myself. basically, i want to make sure that i get out and go to more gay things, and like really get into the scene.
it's been hard so far, because coming home after a year in china, i've appreciated my friends like i never did before. i really cherish the time i spend with them, especially the friends that will be away at grad school or in the air force (!). it's hard to leave the comfort of being with people whose company i enjoy so much, to something that's really pretty new for me.
while my new year's eve was a ton of fun, it really drove home how important it is that i start moving more in that direction. i had an experience that was almost straight out of south of nowhere, where spencer goes on the date with the guy and she's like, "i'm gay." and he's like, "well you've never been on a date with me before." and it was with someone i considered a pretty good friend. not that i think i should blame myself for that, but i feel like i need to put myself in situations where i won't just end up feeling bad.
i'm also writing about this in the blog to mark the end of complaining to my straight friends about my situation. they have been very sympathetic, but i think if someone bitched that much to me about how they need new friends, i'd be like, get out of my face. so there. i'm going to do it, and not just talk about it. resolved!